Fight Spam! Click Here!
Midnight Whispers
Queer as Folk fan fiction - Brian and Justin
Reviews For Why Not With Me
Reviewer: QaFfangirl (Signed) · Date: May 03, 2014 10:42 AM · On: Inside Pockets

This was a beautiful chapter that reflects the open Brian I love so much.  

Reviewer: Trish (Anonymous) · Date: March 26, 2014 11:35 PM · On: Open Letter To Readers

I remember anxiously waiting to read a new chapter with this story and the awe of finally getting to finish it. I loved it then fiercely. It is now years later and I have come back to visit once every few months or so when I'm feeling down and want something beautiful and uplifting...something that'll remind me to dust myself off when the world knocks me down and to stand up and try again. Today, I sat down "just because" and read it all over again and realized I hadn't left a review in all times I've come back to read this fic. So, on the off chance that you're still around and reading your reviews, I leave my sincerest thanks. Your story has been a happy reminder for me for years that beauty exists in many forms and I am incredibly grateful to you for writing it and sharing it. Much love. ;)

Reviewer: CFC (Anonymous) · Date: October 13, 2013 10:56 AM · On: Only Us

Good feelings, good chapter.

Reviewer: Galesgal (Signed) · Date: July 19, 2013 06:08 PM · On: Diners Past, Passengers Present

I am totally loving this story.   I am reading it on my kindle at work.    I cant wait for the jane pain you have sucked me in.

Reviewer: adrita (Anonymous) · Date: April 15, 2013 05:23 AM · On: With Distance

i haven't written much over the chapters I have read, because I have been truly breathless and excited reading, you are such a wonderful writer and you've got such a true gift, and I just want to say thanks for sharing it with me if not all of us :D this is exactly how I imagined the characters would progress after that shitty ending :( but you took it to a whole another level and then some, I am enjoying this so thoroughly that I have this irrational fear of what I'm going to do with myself when this ends, but thanks for this little gem and seriously this has got to be one of the best pieces of fanfiction I have ever read :) -a true fan!

Reviewer: cricrijolie (Anonymous) · Date: January 09, 2013 04:22 PM · On: Loving You

wow, thanks for the ride, I really enjoyed it!! Love from Montreal xox

Reviewer: bookstorequeer (Anonymous) · Date: November 04, 2012 01:21 AM · On: Open Letter To Readers

I just wanted to thank you for writing a touching, thoughtful, emotionally fulfilling story. You've done a great job and I really enjoyed reading it. So, thanks!

Reviewer: wellreadbunny (Signed) · Date: October 17, 2012 01:23 AM · On: Sunday Breakfast With Gus

it was raelly good. Brian is such a good father .I love when he is with Gus its so sweet

Reviewer: Ziggster317 (Signed) · Date: April 23, 2012 08:34 PM · On: Loving You

I know you finished this story a long time ago, but I just found it and finished reading it and I wanted to send you a note saying Thank You for writing it. Not only did I enjoy spending time in this world, but it also gave me a lot to think about when it comes to love and relationships. So thank you for writing and I can't wait to read more of your stories.


Reviewer: viceleah (Anonymous) · Date: October 14, 2011 11:25 PM · On: Open Letter To Readers

You know, I find myself really connected to this story. I've been contemplating about therapy and when I started on this story, I find it so refreshing. I do usually love stories like this where I get out of it more than just laughs and sighs of joy. I love that it makes me views circumstances, relationships, and life in a totally different view. Most of all, it really help me keep my demons at bay. Like I can sort of/kind of see why I am the way I am, just like Brian. I find it beautiful the way you write Brian's and Justin's relationship. I love that Brian is able to accept Justin's love for him completely and to trust him on a physical, emotional, mental, psychological, etc. way just shows how much he's come. I know I'm blabbing but I do want to thank you so much for this wonderfully inspiring and refreshing story. Thanks and thank you so very much.

Reviewer: Angelstar2 (Anonymous) · Date: September 12, 2011 07:24 PM · On: Neglect

so emotional and yet so much growth! Thanks for writing!

Reviewer: bidyke73 (Anonymous) · Date: July 27, 2011 08:49 PM · On: Open Letter To Readers

Dear Tiffany,

I am not sure if I have commented on this one before, because I've read your fic for a second time these days. As a matter of fact, I hadn't read the ending, which wasn't for the reason that I didn't like your story back then, but that I kind of forgot about it after I had less time to be online.

So, now I've finished and read everything in one piece and I agree: It's one of the best QAF stories ever, a "classic". It's not flawless though, indeed it's very controversial and I'm not even sure if I'd call it "in character" most of the time. It doesn't matter as long as it's believeable in itself and as long as it "touches" me. Plus, I'm a sucker for "psychologic" stories. And for strong Justin.

What I don't really like so much, is the conclusion of your story. NOT for the reason that I dislike BDSM. I just would have prefered to have Brian go through all this with Justin's help and just psychotherapy - the way the story starts off. For me, it changes too quickly and whereas I do like the scenes you create, it makes me feel that in reality, a person like Brian wouldn't be sane enough to really consent at this point. And Justin, he's too confident, too patient, too knowing where they probably should have fought first. But these are small things, and it's your story and your choice. So let me just say: It was an amazing read, it was challenging in some ways and yeah, it was well worth it.

Regards, Sabine


Reviewer: LovelessSouls (Signed) · Date: April 12, 2011 01:15 AM · On: Open Letter To Readers

I stumbled across this story late last night and just finished it a few moments ago and I have to say I absolutely loved it. The characters felt very believable for the situations you put them and I think that Brian and Justin developed very well. I'll admit that I stuggled a bit at first accepting the 'new' Brian, but I thouroghly enjoyed watching him make his journey.

Reviewer: reiselust161 (Signed) · Date: January 07, 2011 03:12 PM · On: Open Letter To Readers

Well, Tiffany, it took me only like 5 days to finish your story as I couldn´t leave it till it was finished. It really moved me how intense you could write about that realtionship and the evolution of it. Though sometimes Brian seemed a bit too mushy for me and Justin a bit too much taking over, I enjoyed the story anyway. It´s fiction as the whole Brian/Justin relation is fiction so anything is possible. What is important to see that Brian could let himself fall once and for all into someones arms (figurativly and literally) which he totally deserved, and think was his greatest problem at all. 

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us and letting us relive one of the greatest "non-relationships"


Reviewer: scorpiobleue (Anonymous) · Date: September 04, 2010 10:48 PM · On: Loving You

I've just finished reading the story and it was an amazing, emotional, hopeful experience. I'm so glad that you dealt with how Brian Kinney became Brian Kinney. In the show you got glimpses of what made him tick, but it wasn't fully realized I think. With this story you showed how his horrendous childhood affected the man he became. To watch Brian go through therapy and have his breakthroughs and realizations that he's good and lovable was heartbreaking yet empowering. Just, thanks so much for this story.

Reviewer: Murgy31 (Signed) · Date: August 31, 2010 05:00 AM · On: Closing the Door

I read the whole story tonight and I was going to wait until the end to comment, but this chapter was amazing. This story is brilliant!

Reviewer: dzmom (Signed) · Date: May 07, 2010 06:53 PM · On: Open Letter To Readers

I have loved this story from the very first word. It's beautiful. I would have reviewed more if I'd been able to stop reading long enough to write it down. LOL!

Reviewer: onebookwoman (Anonymous) · Date: March 15, 2010 03:48 PM · On: On the Bathroom Floor

This is a great story so far.  It's been a long time since I've read a complete b/j story.  So far, your interpretations of events, and the anaysis of Dr. Stevenson are believable to me.

I agree with you that a doctor would want his patients to abstain from drugs and alcohol.  I disagree with the readers who want to justify all of Brian's vices, because he's using them for the wrong reasons.  When he lights up a joint to relax at the end of a hard day, that's one thing.  To have one or 2 drinks for the same purpose is not abuse.  When he drinks or takes drugs to mask his own pain, that's when it's a problem.

To the people who feel parents are too prudish about drug/alcohol use: most parents have already gone through their own versions of excess, and they love their children so much that they don't want to see them come to harm.  Even if I knew my kids were partying like that, I'd never say to them, "Have fun getting wasted on whatever you can get."

Reviewer: Anonymous (Anonymous) · Date: March 09, 2010 07:38 PM · On: Up To Today

“So Brian… what you need to think about is whether you’re ready to quit drinking. If you’re ready to quit taking drugs. And if you’re ready to deal only with the real you. With what you feel and what you need.”


Why??? I don't get this at all. Brian shouldn't have to quit drinking and doing drugs. That doesn't make you a better grown up or a better person. It mean even though he doesn't have an addiction he is putting limits on himself, limits he doesn't need. Drug and alcohol are fun. I know that isn't what the self help books tell us or our parents or uptight people that think they are above it and find it immature. Not only are drugs fun but they can be powerful amazing medicines that people need. Our bodies are teeming with dormat cannabinoids waiting to be activated to help us. XTC can help with depression and I think there was a study that it help with heart issues.

This is a challenging story. It challenges my lifestyle and my core believes in freedom of self and freedom of the spirit. Which isn't horrible but... I am going to finish it.

Author's Response:

Okay -- I think I should explain. I wasn't trying to suggest that he had to quit (first of all, this is the doc's opinion, and I think a lot of doctors would suggest that, but I digress). I wasn't trying to suggest that he should quit, necessarily... *takes a deep breath, hoping she can make this make sense* 


Most of this story is, to me, conceptual. What I wanted to do was think about the function that substances were having for him within the story, and to see if / how this function / ends could be achieved via a different means. Within the context of this story, I was trying to explore the idea that Brian was essentially using alcohol to suppress his feelings and ecstasy to try to feel an emotional connection to people. Then, I wanted to use his increased interpersonal awareness and relationship with Justin to see how the same sort of aims could be achieved in another format. My contention then was that, in line with this particular story, his substance abuse was not especially fun -- it served a particular function. Now, I'm not saying it isn't fun -- I'm saying, I wasn't focusing on that side of it for this story. I wasn't trying to disparage it necessarily, and I was hoping that I could show some of the validity of their use -- they had helped him for a long time. 

It was a hard choice for me personally as to whether he would quit substance use or not. The reason I eventually did have him choose it was when he found something else that could "replace" the sensation and function that it was serving in his life.

It's always hard to -- well, actually impossible to know how a story will be interpreted, and I think every interpretation is equally valid, mine as much as anyone's. I can say what I intended, but not really what I wrote -- that depends on what others read. So I wanted to thank you for sharing your thoughts and also to say that I never intended to write a story that threatened freedom of spirit at all. In my own interpretation of the story, Brian ends up more free because he is learning to achieve more emotional freedom through a greater variety of means, and he is more free to be himself (and not how others might sometimes see him).

Thanks for continuing the story although it's a challenging one for you. :)

Reviewer: Heidi (Anonymous) · Date: March 09, 2010 06:30 PM · On: Gaining You

Hmmm. I don't know how to put this without sounding nuts. I think it's really unfair that Brian has to lose all his vices in this story. I find that everyone needs vices in life. No matter how mentally healthy you are vices are there to help you keep things in balance, their there to help you keep control over your life. Even if it's that one smoke you have with your morning coffee. It's part of your routine and part of your life. In a way I feel that you are stripping Brian down and taking away his vices, just to have them be replaced by Justin and in a lot of ways that is unfair to both Brian and Justin.

One of the best things about QAF is how they showed adults liberally using drugs and alcohol and not making it into an afternoon special. Almost all the guys were shown using alcohol and drugs as a way of self medicating, but they also showed drugs and alcohol as something you do to enhance sex and enhance a moment. It's sad to Brian being stripped of those moments.

Brian Kinney means a great deal to me. I grew up in Pittsburgh, my father was a steel worker and a drunk, my mother was a devout Catholic who would drink herself stupid and from 4-9 I raised myself. I also had to miss school because of bruises and not having clean clothes to wear. So watching a person on TV that was so close to who I was and who I became made me feel like less of a freak and more normal. There were moments on the show where I was like OMG that's me. Mostly because Brian seemed to acknowledge his parents abuse and neglect and used them as a catalyst to become who he was and to be perfectly honest I found Brian to be pretty alright warts and all.

Author's Response:

I understand what you mean. My goal wasn't so much for him to become perfect, but rather to present a story in which these things were serving him in a really negative way. And to say that *if* this were true, that the same outcomes could be had in a more productive way. I wasn't trying to say that it was necessarily so terrible in the show, or that it is a terrible thing in RL. I was trying to explore alternatives that might achieve what drug / alcohol use were achieving within this story. 

I agree about the potential "positive side" to drug and alcohol use, but what I wanted to suggest in the "world of the story" was that this was not the primary function they had in his life, and that rather they were used to manipulate his own feelings in a way that ultimately denied him the chance to have genuine emotion. I'm not saying, again, that it was this way all the time in the show. But I wanted to consider how this *could* be, in a sense, handicapping him. 

I guess for me the substance abuse was quite secondary to his identity. I never saw it as being a central part to his character -- I mean, in a way he was "infamous" for it, but in a way I think that did his a disservice because he did a lot of good things that could be overlooked if he is seen as sort of a one-dimensional character. 

It was difficult for me to decide whether he would or wouldn't quit substances, because I don't really think it's necessary, called for, particularly in character, etc. But a lot of this story was, for me, conceptual and so I wanted to see how other experiences might achieve the same end via different means. I don't know if that makes sense or not -- I hope it does. 

I really never meant to suggest that there was anything wrong with Brian... I'm sorry if / that it came out that way. I really had intended to try to showcase parts of his character that are, to me, too often overlooked, such as his generosity and selflessness. I wanted to consider possible reasons for some of his traits (not to condemn them) rather than just write him off as trying to be a jackass or whatever.  I intended to try to respect where he came from and give that consideration in thinking about his behavior (i.e. that he might have legit reasons for not wanting to be married, not that he's "just" trying to be a forever young peter pan. I intended to try to explore more depth to his character into the sort of easy bromides that go with him at times.

I honestly never intended to suggest that I had any problem with him the way he was and I am sorry that it can be interpreted that way... Ultimately I wanted to show his triumph over all of this, and that despite all he'd been through, he'd succeeded and come through entirely intact.

Thanks so much for your thoughts and interpretation. It's very interesting to me to see how the story is taken by readers, and I am very glad that you wrote in! :)

Reviewer: Heidi (Anonymous) · Date: March 08, 2010 11:46 PM · On: Scarves

Is that really what you thought about the scarfing scene in the show? Or is this something you just wrote for this story to give it drama? I am very curious about your answer.


Author's Response:

That is how I felt about the scarfing scene, because of how I felt about the events going on at that time... Not that I don't see / understand other interpretations, but I do favor this interpretation. 


Reviewer: Heather (Anonymous) · Date: March 08, 2010 08:10 PM · On: Bearing Gifts

I wish there was a warmth to this story :( I want to like this story it's a great idea for Brian to face his demons, but I don't feel anything when I read this. This story would be so much better if the characters were let off their leashes and given room to move and tell us how they are feeling. They all seem a like robotic versions of the gang or something.

The only sound in the apartment is the water streaming down against the tiles and the glass. ( tell us what the water sounds like describe the steam on the tiles and the glass.)

Those are the types of details that bring a story to life.

In the bedroom, I light a joint and let the smoke fill my lungs. I can feel myself relaxing, feel the tension slipping away, the memories of tonight getting softer around the edges. ( is Brian sitting on the bed? Laying back? standing in front of his closet? Where is the tension being relieved. Does he feel it in his back loosing his muscles? Is the tightness in his brow go away? How does the joint taste?)

Off to read a bit more.

Author's Response:

Thanks very much for the feedback. I honestly do appreciate it. 

If you dislike the story so much, I hope you don't feel compelled to continue reading for another 50 chapters.

Reviewer: Jasmine (Anonymous) · Date: February 27, 2010 12:13 AM · On: Loving You

 I'm always late discovering good writers! I started reading Heartbreaker in one sitting and than discovered "Why Not With Me'', I plan to finish reading this weekend...Just want to let you know you write so beautifully and I can just hear the words flowing from the mouths of these characters that I've come to love. You are a tru talent my dear!

Author's Response:

Hi - 

Thank so much! That is so sweet! I am delighted to hear that you like the stories so much (I hope you'll like the new one, too!). I really appreciate the feedback and your words -- too kind! :)



Reviewer: TrinTiff (Signed) · Date: February 22, 2010 11:39 PM · On: Loving You

Oh, honey, you did more than justice with it; the culmination of this story as you told it through this last D/s lovemaking scene took my breath away! I am sad to see it end but I think you were right to end it here. You've done a beautiful job with them! You should be very proud!

Hugs, Cindy

Author's Response:

Thank you so much! I'm sorry I'm just getting to this comment! I am so glad you enjoyed the end of the story; I hope you'll enjoy the new one I've just started as well... 


I'm proud to have readers like you! :) :) 


Reviewer: MissMoe (Anonymous) · Date: February 22, 2010 02:27 AM · On: Open Letter To Readers

You know...I've shed a tear or two throughout your fic, but I've definetley cried more reading the end of this fic than I have just reading it. Thank you for such a wonderful read and experience through following it. I'm SO excited to read your other work. I kinda have to take it slow with WIPs, haha. If you're on livejournal my username there is 'sunshinecorazon', please add me there if you have an account :) I'd LOVE to keep in contact through there as well. Ohh I'm sad about this fic, but giddy about reading the rest of your work. *hugs* Again, thanks for such a WONDERFUL fic and for you being such a caring author.

Author's Response:

I'm finally getting around to answering these, so I added you to my LJ account! I'll warn you, I hardly use it though. 

I have loved having you along through the journey of this story -- your comments and enthusiasm have been such a help. I really hope you'll enjoy the rest of the stories as well. It's been my pleasurew to write for you and all the other wonderfully supportive reviewers out there! :) 


P.S. I've shed a tear or two over it myself! And one or two reading reviews...

Submit a Review